Written in a haze of Whiskey and regret, so forgive any errors, typos or cliches……..Today I find myself saying a distant, remote goodbye to someone.  My feelings are distinctly mixed.  Sadness, Grief, anger, frustration, love, loss and a numb confusion.  How should one feel?  Particularly when the someone in question has been such a significant part of my life and so many others.  I simply do not know.  I do not wish to be callous or heartless, but I did my mourning for him at someone else’s funeral, so my loss has happened over and over since then.  I feel bad for feeling anything, and terrible for feeling nothing.  I just hope that those that cherished him are OK, as I know only too well that love, and that side to him, and I hope that this was the over-riding side that they knew.  Today will pan out like any other day, but I feel sad that a part that has been missing for so long, will now always be missing.

RIP Dad x

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